THE ART OF DISAPPOINTMENT
Most often, individuals unconsciously reveal their real personalities through their conversation with you. Occasionally, we prefer to shy away from this revelation to fulfill our “blurred reality.”
As someone with the expectation of a child, we expect a person to fulfill his or her promises when he or she states his or her purposes. Nevertheless, you are oblivious of the person’s esthetic, maybe he or she is tagged a manipulator, unrepentant liar, or a procrastinator. These are the traits that you start to notice as you develop relationships.
As adults, we come to a stark reality that life is much more complicated than what our childhood experiences looked like. We start to understand personality shifts and flaws that may be unacceptable to other people, and with this discovery, disappointment becomes a minor strain.
Disappointment turned into a trendy topic when an individual said that I have an “I don’t care attitude about support for my book.” I had to reassure the person that the feeling was non-existent as I care but not in a way that will make me feel disappointed. When I write, I do not have thoughts about those who will not purchase my books or offer support for my children’s book as that is not my major focus. I desire to concentrate on my major purpose which is uplifting natural hair girls who may have been demoralized by negative saying that their hair is not good enough, which means it is “nappy.”
PLAYING THE BLAME GAME
Sometimes, we disappoint ourselves by setting expectations that we fail to meet. As a result, I do not set any expectations, but I engaged in seed planting, which is writing and marketing. This made me receive unprecedented support and unique connections with uncommon individuals who have assisted me to be the person who can make a difference.
Concentrating on the “who and what” of the disappointment can lead you to a destructive path of anxiety and depression which may take you several years to recover from. Most often, I usually have alternative plans when an individual doesn’t meet my expectation. In fact, I have plans B, C, D, E, AND F.
Whether we like it or not, disappointments are critical parts of our growth process. It assists us to manage our emotions positively and leaves an indelible mark on our present actions.
ARE OTHER PEOPLE TO BE BLAMED FOR OUR DISAPPOINTMENTS?
Pointing accusing fingers at the other individual take off the responsibility from your shoulders, and this is an ineffective learning experience.
Did you set true-to-life standards for this person? Were they always this way? Is it possible that you could have finished the task without the help of anyone? If the answer is NO, how can you move forward in a straightforward manner favorable to your mental health?
I couldn’t expect someone who told me from the beginning that he does not want a relationship to be committed. Irrespective of what was said throughout us being together, we weren’t together in the actual sense.
I have realized that I have been disappointed by numerous individuals in life. These are friends, family members, classmates, and partners in relationships. Every time, I feel frustrated that I am putting my confidence in an individual who cannot fulfill my immediate need. Well, it does not mean I do not have affection for them or like them, it is just a sign that I am not willing to put myself in a condition that will make me live in constant fear, frustration and focus on a cynical view of the world.